Patience is a Virtue

In my many a hours on the road and in the air lately I've debated writing a blog {key word debated as my mind is so JAM PACKED with work and 'to do' lists and gymnastics commitments that I cant even sleep lately, serious} regarding all that's jammed into this head lately. I've gone back and forth on my 'coming out' of sorts, and I've decided that in the end I've always always ALWAYS been real with myself and others and value openness and honesty, so what am I waiting for?

 There are SO MANY wonderful things in my life, none of which I could complain about for even a second. For instance, yesterday, a deal closed down in Cincinnati at Ohio Hematology Care, a large cancer clinic (one of 27) of mine that purchased over $200,000 in safety hubers of B. Braun's that i've been working on since last August. The patients said it hurt less than the hubers they are used to (hello best job ever) and felt more comfortable on their skin (not much makes me sleep better at night than knowing people undergoing such a depressing disease can feel comfortable in a small way). My aunt wore a port for many months, so Oncology clinics and this product really hit home for me. I digress.....so why am I down and out lately you ask? ....I'll dodge that question a bit longer. I mean, why have to publicize EVERYTHING this day in age... FB, Instagram, Twitter, Blogger.... cant anyone be private or keep surprises any longer? Well, that just wouldn't be me. I don't believe anyone should look at anyone's life (internet life/stranger or not) and think that every single aspect is absolutely perfect, b/c lets be real, there is always something we would wiggle our noses and make different/add/change in our lives.

To summarize (and digress longer) there is alot in my life to be thankful for, that I certainly am not undermining. 'When you love what you have you have everything you need', is on my kitchen wall chalkboard and I truly feel blessed for every single part of my life. My job, my husband, the girls I coach, my friends, my family, my health, my our home, etc etc etc....{Enter the coming out part}....

WE ARE SO READY FOR A BABY.... AND, I"M NOT PREGNANT. {le sigh}

Whew, there, I said it..... and I'm already debating on closing this laptop and hiding under my "stop being so dramatic and emotional" rock. But, I wont. This coming from the woman who one said she 'didnt neeeeeed to be married' and that it would just be an added bonus, who now cannot even imagine life without her husband. Who also once said 'you know what, if we get pregnant, we get pregnant and if we don't, we'll survive' (which we will). But, when you are officially trying, it's MUCH HARDER to be patient. I know, I know, we've only been trying for a month or so (3) and I've been on BC for 15 years do to the estrogen my body lacks (which must explain why I've always been so UN-emotional & level headed, and now feel cray cray with this new hormonal imbalance).

 I went to the OB/GYN who basically laughed at my 'we've been trying for three months and I want to just be sure via bloodwork that all is well' rant last month, but good news is, alls good in the fertility and ovulation hood.... SO, why am I not preggo? <see title of blog>

In most avenues of my life (my sales career, my to do lists, my need to be a good friend), lack of patience and promptness are strong virtures. This, is not one of them. I need a pep talk people.

Good news is my bestie Steph is pregnant (due in July) and Kat is due in 4 weeks. My sister has a 9 month old (hello, nephew obsession) and my Goddaughter Lucy is the apple of my eye, the frick to my frack, the peanut butter to my jelly..... I adore all of these people and CANNOT wait to adore their soon-to-be children too. But, I am also ready to bear my own. 

Strangers, friends, heaven above--- send us baby dust--I'm ready to be a Momma.

xoxo,

Andi